There’s an old Hollywood joke that pithily sums up an actor’s full-circle career arc:
Who is John Doe? Get me John Doe! Get me a John Doe-type. Get me a young John Doe. Who is John Doe?
There’s a similar arc for most musicians, and it can be based on their transportation:
Drive the van. Ride in the van. Ride in the bus. Ride on the plane. Ride on the bus. Ride in the van. Drive the van.
There was a big ol’ bus parked outside the tiny Green Lantern Bar in Lexington, Kentucky last night. MJ Lenderman is blowing up. And rightfully so — his music is great.
Six years ago, he was scooping ice cream at a shop in Asheville to support his musical efforts, which included playing guitar for a band called Wednesday (whose ’23 album Rat Saw God is one of my faves from that year).
Three years ago, he released an album called Boat Songs, and got in a van to do a tour that included tiny clubs like the Green Lantern Bar. By the end of the year, Boat Songs hadn’t move a lot of units, but it garnered critical acclaim.
Wikipedia: Lenderman contributed guitar and vocals to the album Tiger’s Blood by Waxahatchee, released in March 2024, and was listed as featured guest artist on the album’s lead single, “Right Back To It”. In March 2024, Lenderman performed “Right Back To It” with Waxahatchee on The Late Show with Stephen Colbert.[14] Lenderman’s next album, Manning Fireworks, was released in September 2024.
The next leg of his U.S. tour will be at larger venues. And good luck getting tickets!
The Green Lantern is a tiny dive bar. But it’s very musician-friendly.
It would’ve been very easy for MJ Lenderman and his five-piece band to play a larger venue in Lexington on his current tour. Or skip Lexington altogether, for bigger clubs in bigger cities, for a bigger paycheck. (Diesel gas for the bus ain’t cheap.) Instead, he booked two shows at the Green Lantern.
I was lucky enough to be at last night’s show, thanks to my friend and neighbor Frank, who got tickets as soon as they went on sale… and before Lendermania (yeah, I’m gonna trademark that one!) reached a fever pitch.
Clearly the folks at the bar made an impression on MJ. And he was paying it backward. Because he knows what two sold-out shows means to a small club. And he still remembers what it’s like to scoop ice cream while following your dream.
“Once music and work and money all become the same thing, it gets hard to do it casually. But that was the reason I was able to do anything meaningful in the first place,” he admits. “You can see that through my whole life, just being able to go to a friend’s house and make something and not worry about what it is.”
My dear friend LJ (okay, his real name is John but I never call him that) turned 61 yesterday. For his birthday, he got… surgery. He had a cancerous brain tumor removed last May and has been an absolute champion since then, through the radiation and the oral chemo and the testing regimen. Zapping. Poking. Prodding. Like water off a duck’s back for LJ, who has been both a rock and a rock star.
His latest scan showed some “activity” in the area where the tumor was removed, so the docs went back in yesterday, did a biopsy while he was sedated, and found out it was a recurrence/regeneration of the cancer. So they removed that, and put in some radiation tiles that will zap the area from the inside.
As birthday presents go, “surgery to remove cancer from my cranium” has gotta be pretty low on the wish list. But knowing how LJ is, his reaction won’t be “it sucks” but rather “it is what it is.” He’s been steadfast in his approach: day by day.
One of my favorite musicians, Jesse Malin, calls it “PMA” – Positive Mental Attitude. LJ’s PMA is off-the-charts good. Radiation tiles are one weapon to fight the cancer, but we should never discount the power of PMA. And LJ has other weapons in his beat-cancer arsenal too. I listed them in my post about LJ last year, and they still hold true today:
LJ is in great shape.
He has a family that loves him… and grandkids who adore him.
His faith is strong.
His support network is deep and wide — relatives, neighborhood friends, church friends, even a bunch of knuckleheads from college.
[Phil, LJ, Brian, Dubbatrubba, and Art – Uber driver Tom wasn’t able to attend, but his wife Jodi was there.]
I wouldn’t wish cancer upon my worst enemy. But I do wish that all of us could channel LJ’s PMA. He knows quite profoundly what most of us spend a lifetime ignoring: the present is a present.
He didn’t choose cancer. But he’s choosing to continue to live his life in an exemplary way. With serenity, not anxiety. With love, not anger. With gratitude, not bitterness. In joy, not sorrow.
What I said last year still holds true:
If anyone can beat the odds — and people DO beat the odds — it’s LJ.
We hope. We pray. We believe in miracles. And we cherish the time we get to spend with him.
We don’t know what the future holds. That’s not just true for LJ. It’s true for all of us.
This is NOT a music-related post. (I have to post that disclaimer, as two of the four regular readers of this blog don’t like my musical musings.)
Michelle Zauner is the leader of the band Japanese Breakfast. I’m a huge fan. (Their new album comes out soon!)
But she also wrote a very moving memoir about loss – her book Crying in H Mart. When her mother was diagnosed with cancer, Michelle left her East Coast band and flew back to her childhood home in Eugene, Oregon, to take care of her mom during her final months. And as a Korean-American who lost not just her mom but her connection to her Korean heritage, Michelle feels the grief quite intensely.
I can sorta-kinda relate. I’m not mixed race like Michelle, but my mom was first generation Italian-American. And when she passed away, I lost that connection to the Italian part of my heritage. I was lucky enough to spend some quality time with my Italian aunts (Rosetta and Inez) growing up, but chances are my feelings of “Italian-ness” would be much stronger had my mom not passed away when I was so young.
I hadn’t thought about that a lot, until I listened to Michelle speak about her book at Cincinnati’s Mercantile Library earlier this week.
I found myself getting a bit misty-eyed when she talked about the sense of not just maternal loss but also cultural loss. And I started to think that I’m not just a fan of Michelle’s band, but also a kindred spirit with her.
Then. later in the week, I saw this quote:
It is essential for us to welcome our grief, whatever form it takes. When we do, we open ourselves to our shared experiences in life. Grief is our common bond. Opening to our sorrow connects us with everyone, everywhere.
— Francis Weller
Yes, I’m a kindred spirit with Michelle Zauner. And with you. And with everyone who has suffered loss… which is “everyone, everywhere.”
Grateful Living has a monthly series called “Grateful Gatherings.” As fate would have it, the focus for March is “Grief & Gratefulness.” Here’s another Francis Weller quote:
“Gratitude is the other hand of grief. It is the mature person who welcomes both. To deny either reality is to slip into chronic depression or to live in a superficial reality. Together they form a prayer that makes tangible the exquisite richness of life in this moment. Life is hard and filled with suffering. Life is also a most precious gift, a reason for continual celebration and appreciation.”
Amen to that!
The Grief & Gratefulness resources are here. Should you find yourself crying in H Mart, or in the Mercantile Library, or anywhere, really, they could come in handy.
The Mercantile Library is an absolute gem in the Queen City. It’s been open since 1835, but recently completed a remodel that adds much more cool space to what already was the city’s best haven for “readers, writers, and thinkers” as their website says. Michelle Zauner this past Tuesday, Curtis Sittenfeld this past Friday… with Timothy Egan, Crystal Wilkinson, Ada Limón, Colson Whitehead, Kaveh Akbar, and Lauren Groff still on tap this year, along with several other authors, plus book clubs, poetry readings, yoga, and so much more.
It’s a membership library, but the low cost would be worth it just to hang out in their space, and membership gets you early (and often free) access to the author events.
This was published in 1991. Seems appropriate for our times.
THE CURE OF TROY – by Seamus Heaney
Human beings suffer, they torture one another, they get hurt and get hard. No poem or play or song can fully right a wrong inflicted or endured.
The innocent in gaols beat on their bars together. A hunger-striker’s father stands in the graveyard dumb. The police widow in veils faints at the funeral home.
History says, Don’t hope on this side of the grave. But then, once in a lifetime the longed for tidal wave of justice can rise up, and hope and history rhyme.
So hope for a great sea-change on the far side of revenge. Believe that a further shore is reachable from here. Believe in miracles and cures and healing wells.
Call the miracle self-healing: The utter self-revealing double-take of feeling. If there’s fire on the mountain Or lightning and storm And a god speaks from the sky
That means someone is hearing the outcry and the birth-cry of new life at its term.
It means once in a lifetime That justice can rise up And hope and history rhyme.
We could use some rhyme time right about now.
But then, once in a lifetime the longed for tidal wave of justice can rise up, and hope and history rhyme. So hope for a great sea-change on the far side of revenge. Believe that a further shore is reachable from here. Believe in miracles and cures and healing wells.
I do believe that a further shore is reachable from here. Especially if we all join hands.
Hearing Seamus read his poem is like music. And here’s a bit more musical hope:
That nothing grows on, but time still goes on Through each laugh of misery
Everybody’s gotta hold on hope It’s the last thing that’s holding me
The podcast “Literally! with Rob Lowe” is in my regular rotation. I don’t get to every episode, but they’re usually pretty entertaining. The last one I listened to, however, was quite enlightening. Rob’s guest spoke eloquently and intelligently about the origins of makeup in this one-minute clip:
I certainly wasn’t expecting such erudition from this guy:
Yep, the self-proclaimed “God of Thunder” is actually a really smart cookie. And he makes no bones about the fact that he and his KISS buddy Paul Stanley were more interested in success than critical acclaim. But the podcast interview gives a lot more insight into that drive. It came from Gene’s mom, a Holocaust survivor who, at the age of 14, watched as her mother and grandmother were led away to the gas chambers.
Gene’s mom instilled in her only child a drive to make money… but as a means of safety, as some insulation against harm and danger. And Gene talks about how his mom was — and still is — his compass, and the person who gave him some much needed perspective on what really matters.
I tuned in expecting some laughs and funny stories (and the episode has those), but I didn’t expect the history lesson, and the emotional gravitas.
Gene may wanna rock and roll all night, and party every day… but there’s some real substance behind that kabuki makeup.
You can listen to the full podcast here on Podcast Addict (my favorite app for collating and listening to podcasts).
The guy in the photo above might look like a surly biker dude, but really he’s a sweetheart – one of the kindest folks you’ll ever meet. [photo credit: Anna Stockton]
Hi name is Chuck Cleaver. Yeah, I know, it sounds like the stage name of a wrestling “heel” in the WWE. But that’s his real name. And he’s one of the best songwriters in the WWW – the Whole Wide World.
Five Saturdays ago, Chuck and Lisa Walker, his fellow songwriter and co-leader of the band Wussy, played a house concert at our house.
It was amazing. Spectacular, in a low-key way. Spine-tinglingly beautiful. They did a lot of songs from their upcoming album. A lot of those songs are tributes to… remembrances of… mournings for… their dear friend and fellow Wussy bandmate John Erhardt, who passed away a few years ago. John also was Chuck’s bandmate in his pre-Wussy band, The Ass Ponys. All those years spent in a van, traveling from gig to gig, turned them into more brothers than bandmates.
Three Saturdays later, Chuck and Lisa and their bandmates played a sold-out show at a local venue. It was only their second time performing as a full band since John passed away.
The love from the audience — and the band’s appreciation of that love — were palpable. Once again, they played several songs from the new album, the one for John. (He’s featured in the cover artwork, and his beautiful pedal steel work is on a couple of tracks.)
“It’s very definitely a record for John,” Cleaver says. “It’s a mourning record. We had to make it.”
The album had its official release a week ago Friday… and is amazing (as are all the other Wussy releases… as Jason Cohen said in his article linked above “There’s no middle ground with Wussy: They are either one of your very favorite bands or you just haven’t heard them yet.” I’m firmly in the former camp.)
That record-release Friday should’ve been a different type of release as well: a day of joy… celebration.
But on the Tuesday between their sold-out show and the Friday that their new album came out, Randy Cheek — Chuck’s longtime bandmate in the Ass Ponys — passed away.
I know life is a series of peaks and valleys. But my heart aches for Chuck, who was in the valley so long after losing John, and now, on the verge of a peak moment, got gut-punched back down into another valley. It’s not fair. And it sucks.
“Time is an assassin, when it finally tracks you down
You can’t tiptoe around it or conveniently skip town
So try to face it screaming and beating on your chest
So when it drags you to wherever, you know you did your best
Sure as the sun… ”
— “Sure as the Sun” from Wussy’s new album Cincinnati Ohio
I got to know Randy a tad, during my 97X radio days. He was exactly as Chuck described him: sweet, kind, truly hilarious.
It was nice to see Randy, John, Dave and Chuck back on stage together at the Ass Ponys reunion shows back in 2015. (Two nights – you’re damn right I went to both shows.)
(Jason Cohen’s Cincinnati Magazine article about those reunion shows is here.)
I took Chuck’s advice and cranked up this song that Randy wrote.
Playing Ass Ponys and Wussy tunes… it won’t bring John and Randy back, but it keeps them in our hearts. That’ll have to do.
Dear Friends Mysterious doorway Future life For better for worse Life’s blessings In heaven we know Our own glories
Glories of the sacred In the wonder days The wonder gifts The wonder story
In the quiet moments of reflection, let us honor Randall’s memory by embracing the beauty of each fleeting moment, knowing that his spirit resides in the eternal tapestry of existence, forever woven into the fabric of our hearts.
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