If there’s one thing I’m good at, it’s side hustles that make absolute no money at all. In fact, you’re soaking in one right now.
In addition to this blog (time investment: 1-3 hours/week. Net revenue: $0/year), I also send out a weekly “this week in live music” post to a mailing list of 100+ fellow music fans (time investment: 2+ hours/week. Net revenue: $0/year).
But I finally came up with a sure-fire, can’t-miss, 100% guaranteed to make money idea: T-shirts with goofy slogans on them!
Why, what nearly- or newly-licensed young man wouldn’t want to wear this snazzy yet snarky shirt?
And what nearly- or newly-licensed young man OR woman wouldn’t want to have this shirt?
Stunt driver, get it? Oh, so wacky!
The answer to both questions, thus far, is: every darn kid in America.
But that’s just because they can’t find these shirts. Or more likely, because their parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents and friends, in their desperate search for a 16th birthday gift that’s slightly more affordable than a $400 phone and/or $170 headphones, have yet to stumble upon these gems on Amazon.com (starting at the low, low price of $14.99 for the “stud” t-shirt!).
But they’re on Amazon. They’re also on Teepublic. And Redbubble, where in addition to t-shirts, you can get bumper stickers, coffee mugs, phone cases and dozens of other products emblazoned with the professional artwork shown here.
However, in the “long tail” world of online retail, it’s a bit of a Catch-22. You can’t sell merch until people know about your stuff, but they won’t know about your stuff until you sell some merch.
That’s where you come in, my friends. I suck at shameless self-promotion (present blog post excluded). I barely have a Facebook presence. Ditto for Instagram. I don’t do Pinterest. And if I order 10 t-shirts on Amazon and have them all shipped to my address, that won’t help get the ball rolling… Bezos will see right through my sham sales.
But if YOU buy a shirt, that will boost my “best seller rating” and move me up the search ladder, from my current status on the 361st page of search results, to — dare to dream — the first page! If you buy a shirt AND write a review? Jackpot! The tiny sales snowball will turn into an avalanche, and I’ll be laughing all the way to the bank with my $1.37 commission.
Yes, I know, I’m asking you to open your wallet. And I feel a bit like a slimy televangelist for doing it.
But surely you know someone who is just getting their driver’s license. Hook ’em up with a crappy t-shirt AND help out your old pal dubbatrubba at the same time. Win-win. (Except for your wallet.)
Even if you don’t spring for a shirt, please share an image of the shirt(s) and the Amazon link within your social networks. Post it, Pin it, Gram it… make a TikTok… whatever. (Right click on the t-shirt image above, then choose “save image as” to save it.) And if you know anything at all about Facebook ads or Amazon sponsored ads, let’s talk.
When I make my first million, we’ll have a giant party on my yacht and you’ll be invited. Pinky promise!
Thanks for helping promote the smallest small business in America!
Cincinnati’s pro football team is abysmal. Our baseball team is dismal. But in spite of that — or perhaps because of it — we’re #1 in another cherished sport: beer drinking!
Smartasset (great name, btw) used 5 factors to rank the cities:
Total number of breweries
Breweries per 100,000 residents
Average number of beers per brewery
Bars per 100,000 residents and
Average price for a pint of domestic beer in each city
Relative affordability and variety make the city a savory option for even the choosiest of beer lovers.
Our household has four pets. The two low-maintenance, no-muss, no-fuss cats? Those would be mine.
The “wake up” and “be awesome” parts are optional.
The two giant, stinky, dirty-pawed, have-to-let-them-out-no-matter-the-weather beasts? Those belong to my wife.
However, I usually get up before my wife, and as soon as the dogs hear signs of life, they are rarin’ to go. So I have to let them out each morning, and feed them breakfast. But dogs being the tricky creatures that they are, with no self-regulating stomachs, would bust out the “puppy dog eyes” when my wife got up, and act like they hadn’t just been fed.
Exhibit A: Hope, as in “I hope she falls for it.” Exhibit B: Bibo, the poor widdle pupper-wupper who is STARVING!
But their days (and nights) of doggie double dipping are OVER, thanks to a state-of-the-art solution called an “index card.”
“Breakfast” on one side, “dinner” on the other. Once we fill the bowl, we flip the script.
Don’t call PETA on me, these dogs are in no danger of starving anytime soon. They still use those puppy dog eyes to get a spoonful of peanut butter every day… and they occasionally help themselves to whatever food is within snout’s reach on the counter.
Be sure to tune in next time for Episode 2: Dogs taking up the entire bed.
I stumbled across this gem on Twitter yesterday… I’m sure every dog owner can relate.
That Twitter user, Dick King-Smith (@DickKingSmith) is the author of the book that was adapted into the movie Babe, and he has a bunch of fun animal videos. Good for a chuckle. Not that any of us need to waste any more time on the Interwebs on cat, dog, squirrel, emu, rabbit and seal videos.
Seth Godin just plain gets it. First of all, the dude writes a blog post every day. Yes, that’s right. Every. Single. Day. Neither rain, nor snow, nor authoring books nor hosting workshops nor speaking at conferences, will keep Mr. Godin from his appointed rounds — sharing pearls of wisdom with folks like you… and fanboys like me.
It’s my favorite holiday for a good reason: It doesn’t matter what country, what culture or what background you come from…
Gratitude works.
Gratitude scales.
Gratitude creates a positive cycle of more gratitude.
When in doubt, default to gratitude.
Brief and brilliant. Words to live by. Not just today. Every. Single. Day!
[I’m extremely grateful for Seth’s “write a blog post a day for a week” challenge a few years ago — it kickstarted my blogging habit. I’m also grateful for you — thanks for reading!]
That’s Dwayne Haskins, the rookie quarterback for the Washington Redskins. The dude with the $14 million contract. He’s celebrating his first win as a starter by taking a selfie with fans. Actually, in the photo above, he’s celebrating his first presumed win. There were still two ticks left on the clock. The Redskins had just intercepted the ball. All they had to do was take a knee… but Haskins was too busy taking a selfie to trot out onto the field for the final play.
The Redskins interim coach (yes, it’s been a bad season) couldn’t track down Haskins. (Maybe he should’ve checked Instagram.) So he had to scramble and send the backup QB onto the field to seal the victory.
After the game, Haskins admitted that he thought the clock ran out on the interception. So maybe we should just chalk it up to the exuberance of youth. But seriously, it was only a three-point game at the time. Keep your head in the game until the game is officially over.
(AP Photo/Patrick Semansky)
Maybe I’m overthinking it. After all, with just a few seconds left, what could possibly go wrong?
To me, Haskins sideline antics are a symptom of a larger problem in the selfish/selfie world. Instead of being on the field with his teammates to celebrate his first ever win as an NFL starter, Haskins was hamming it up for the camera… “pics or it didn’t happen.”
I see it all the time at concerts too – people (of all ages, this isn’t an “OK Boomer” rant) whipping out their cell phones to capture video of a band’s biggest hit. Here’s an idea: keep your damn phone in your pants and experience that moment with your own eyeballs! Those memories will be much better than some shaky video footage with distorted audio.
But don’t just take it from me, take it from an expert on living life to the fullest:
A couple of Saturdays ago, Mrs. Dubbatrubba and I went on a two hour urban hike. We started just north of downtown, went to Washington Park, then north to Findlay Market… then up (and later down) several sets of steps that took us to Mt. Auburn, Pendleton and Liberty Hill.
During our 11,000 steps, I saw streets I never would’ve found otherwise, many of them with homes from the 1800s. I’ve lived in Cincinnati for 30+ years, yet on that Saturday hike, I walked through parks I never knew existed, and enjoyed views of the city that I’d never experienced previously.
View from Jackson Park in Mt. Auburn
We went past old breweries, down original cobblestone streets, through an alley filled with street art… and up really long sets of steps.
Photo: Scott Beseler
Cincinnati lays claim to being a “City of Seven Hills” (although no one can agree on which seven are the official ones). Back in the day, these steps were part of the daily commute for the folks working in the breweries and meat-packing plants of “Porkopolis.”
Liberty Steps. Photo: Scott Beseler
This Soapbox Media article from 2016 has great information about the steps that help connect the city, and its residents. Here’s an excerpt:
At the height of their use in the 19th Century, over 30 miles of hillside steps once connected the neighborhoods of Cincinnati to each other. The first were installed by Mt. Auburn residents in the 1830s in order to gain easier access to Findlay Market in Over-the-Rhine. These days, some are more travelled than others and many have been closed; some are in decent condition, but others are trashed and overgrown.
As a reward for the climb, the ascending pedestrian is greeted at the top with scenic vistas of downtown, the Ohio River and beyond. Not just for recreation, however, the hillside steps are also an integral part of our city’s transportation system and provide a pedestrian-friendly connection to some remote areas of the city.
“What separates Cincinnati from other major cities are the steps, and they are essential. San Francisco has beautiful hills, but most access points are on private property. You never get a really good perspective of the hills, valleys and views unless you are in an expensive hotel or restaurant.”
Carl B. Westmoreland Jr., as quoted in John Clubbe’s exhaustive and learned Cincinnati Observed guide to the city – from the Soapbox article linked above
Kudos to Derek Scacchetti for organizing and leading these walks, through his Urban Rangers group.
“As Urban Rangers, we bring people together to make a habit of purposeful walking, to explore the urban environment, and to be advocates for pedestrianism and our city’s public spaces.”
(Check out the Urban Rangers Instagram for some great tour shots.)
And a shout-out to Spring in Our Steps for helping to clean up, preserve and mark many long-neglected public alleys and stairways. An interactive map of more than 300 sets of steps in Cincinnati is here.
There’s a lot to be said for being a tourist in your own town. You don’t always have to go across the country or around the world to enjoy new sights and make new friends. Sometimes adventure awaits a lot closer to home.
Morgan Hentz is an all-universe volleyball player. Two-time All-American, and two-time NCAA champion with Stanford.
I worked with Morgan’s dad Mike at an ad agency eons ago. We still get together for the occasional happy hour, but those are few and far between, for reasons that will become patently obvious when you read this wonderful article about Morgan and the Hentz family on the Stanford Athletics website.
Morgan’s younger brother Louie had a cancerous brain tumor at age one. Louie and his mom, Kerin, spent a year at St. Jude’s in Memphis… yes, a full year… while Mike mostly stayed home with Morgan and her sister. Wrap your head around that for a moment: a mom separated from her young daughters, a father 500 miles away while his infant son was fighting for his life.
Then the other shoe dropped: at age 3, Louie was diagnosed with autism.
Louie does not interact through spoken language – other than simple wants and needs. He’s 16 and weighs 300 pounds because of his meds, and can be difficult to control physically. His life has been one of appointments and therapists. His development has been slow — hopeful on a good day. He is repeating some lines from familiar movies and videos, creating some optimism about brain development. But there’s no way to know.
Morgan is a superstar, but so is the rest of her family.
Long ago, Kerin and Mike learned to sacrifice things that other couples take for granted – nights and weekends away, dinners out, and even time with their other children. Instead, they’ve learned to roll with whatever happens and be prepared for whatever comes next.
Every day is a new challenge. Mike and Kerin have been playing at the highest level for 16 years. They’re world champs in the game that matters most.
“I feel like I would never wish what Louie had on anyone, but I think that because of my family and being able to make the most of the situation, I’ve learned a lot from him and my parents. They are the biggest role models in my life — the sacrifices they have made for our family. They have always put us kids first.”
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