My old radio boss is finally calling it quits on broadcasting. Gary Burbank was the last of his breed, a radio personality who did “theater of the mind” comedy sketches. Mel Blanc may have been called the “Man of 1,000 Voices” in Looney Tunes cartoons, but Gary probably did more voices than anyone else, including Mel. And unlike the current breed of “morning zoo” personalities, his bits were funny without being prurient and/or insipid.
Photo credit: The Cincinnati Enquirer/Michael E. Keating
Gary’s show was syndicated to multiple stations in the mid- to late-90s, which is when I was part of the cast and crew. I learned a lot from GB -about humor in general, about doing character voices, about comedic timing, about how to deal with freelance writers and how to organize a show. Every day was a new adventure. It wasn’t always easy, but the end result was always entertaining. In many ways it was a dream job for me, but I was born about 20 years too late to be able to make a decent living at it.
In 2007, Gary retired from his weekday afternoon radio show on WLW-AM (known as “the nation’s station” because as a 50,000 watt clear channel AM station based in Cincinnati, it would reach 38 states at night). He created dozens of indelible characters (a partial list is on this Wikipedia page) but the one who lasted the longest was Earl Pitts, a blue-collar, ‘murica-loving redneck. Even after he retired from his daily show, Gary continued to record Earl Pitts commentaries, which are syndicated and air on several stations around the country. Now, at 79, he’s finally calling it quits on Pitts.
Gary’s already in the national Radio Hall of Fame — deservedly so — and at this point in his life he’s certainly earned the right to call it a day. But it’s a sad day for radio, because they don’t make ’em like Gary anymore. The good news is, Gary is turning his attention to a podcast that will feature several of the characters he created. So we’ll still be able to hear his voice(s).
You can read more in this article from John Kiesewetter, formerly of the Cincinnati Enquirer and now with WVXU (the former Xavier University station!).
The pandemic has been a boon for my reading habits. I don’t watch a lot of TV — although I did plow through all four seasons of The Good Place and loved it — so I had plenty of spare time to curl up with a good book. Or eBook.
I like to zig when everyone else zags, so while I did get a eReader, it’s not a Kindle. (Take that Bezos! I’m sure losing my business might sink your whole operation.) I bought a Kobo. I said “Kobo” not Koko!
Not only was my Kobo Clara HD cheaper than a comparable Kindle, but it has two features I really love:
Any books I borrow from the Cincinnati Public Library via Overdrive are automagically added to my Kobo.
Any web articles I save via the Pocket brower add-on (and I save a lot of articles this way) also are added automagically.
So I’m never short of free reading material. (Speaking of free, this is not a paid endorsement of Kobo readers… but I AM open to a bit of “influencer” cash… Kobo, ring me up!)
I also set up a Goodreads account recently, to start tracking the books I’ve read. Here’s my most recent half-dozen:
That’s a pretty good cross-section of my tastes, which definitely lean toward band biographies, “light” fiction/memoirs and humorous essays. I’m not a book snob by any means. Any book someone enjoys reading is a “good book” in my book.
Ray Bradbury, an all-time great
Tamara Shopsin’s book on the list above was good, but I thought her book Stupid, Arbitrary Goal was fantastic. David Rakoff’s essays are great. And better still, my friend Jay got a shout-out in the acknowledgements of Fraud (or maybe it was in Don’t Get Too Comfortable… I’ve been reading a lot of Rakoff.) Here’s what Jay said about him:
David was a great writer—really funny and poignant in equal measure. And just a wonderful guy. I edited him when I worked at Outside. It was very kind of him to give me a shout-out. I miss his voice and I miss him. He was taken from us much, much too soon.
I agree 100% with Jay’s “funny and poignant in equal measure” assessment. And yes, he left us way too soon.
Pandemic lockdown has been a real bummer in many ways, but it’s created more time for reading, and that’s certainly a plus.
MacKenzie Scott has become a game-changer for charities across the country.
Scott, an award-winning novelist, helped found Amazon with Jeff Bezos, the world’s richest man, in 1994. They were married for 25 years before their divorce in 2019. As part of that settlement, Scott received $35 billion and a 4% stake in the online retail giant, reported to be worth $35.6 billion on its own. Not long after the divorce was finalized, Scott signed the Giving Pledge, a commitment to give half her assets, or at least $17 billion, to charity over her lifetime or in her will.
Over the past four months, she’s donated greater than $4 billion to 384 organizations across all 50 states, D.C. and Puerto Rico. In Cincinnati, several non-profits recently received record-setting donations from Ms. Scott. The United Way of Greater Cincinnati got $25 million, when a typical major gift is around $1 million.
“This validates United Way’s direction and hard work, and it comes at a great time,” Moira Weir, president and CEO of United Way, said in a release. “[The year] 2020 provided a fresh perspective on inequities in our community. Many took stock in the privilege and benefits they enjoy and pledged to change systems to advance equity. United Way now has the opportunity to capitalize on that momentum.”
From the Cincinnati Business Courier article cited above.
And MacKenzie Scott isn’t just tossing around money willy-nilly. Unlike some other folks…
MacKenzie Scott and her team used data to determine the places where her donations were most needed AND could make the most impact.
I asked a team of advisors to help me accelerate my 2020 giving through immediate support to people suffering the economic effects of the crisis. They took a data-driven approach to identifying organizations with strong leadership teams and results, with special attention to those operating in communities facing high projected food insecurity, high measures of racial inequity, high local poverty rates, and low access to philanthropic capital.
These contributions are game-changers. Actually, they’re life-changers.
These 384 carefully selected teams have dedicated their lives to helping others, working and volunteering and serving real people face-to-face at bedsides and tables, in prisons and courtrooms and classrooms, on streets and hospital wards and hotlines and frontlines of all types and sizes, day after day after day. They help by delivering vital services, and also through the profound encouragement felt each time a person is seen, valued, and trusted by another human being. This kind of encouragement has a special power when it comes from a stranger, and it works its magic on everyone.
From the Medium post cited above
Please read Ms. Scott’s Medium post in its entirety. It’s both eye-opening and heart-warming.
You and I probably don’t have $4 billion to donate to charity. (I checked under my couch cushions… nothing but stale Cheetos.) But if you’ve managed to ride out the pandemic and remain gainfully employed, you’re a lot better off than millions of Americans. We might not have MacKenzie Scott’s checkbook, but we certainly can take a page from her playbook:
If you’re craving a way to use your time, voice, or money to help others at the end of this difficult year, I highly recommend a gift to one of the thousands of organizations doing remarkable work all across the country. Every one of them could benefit from more resources to share with the communities they’re serving. And the hope you feed with your gift is likely to feed your own.
From an old article by Brian Doyle, republished this week in The American Scholar:
Can I ask you a strange favor? On Monday night, December 22, go outside with your kids, or your friends, or your neighbors, and start a bonfire… And when it is going well, when it’s leaping and steady and warmer than you remember bonfires being, stand around it with your friends or your loved ones, and tell stories, and laugh, maybe have a beer, maybe even sing a little.
Mr. Doyle asked us for that favor because Joe Strummer (musician, singer, songwriter, co-founder of The Clash) died on December 22, 2002.
his favorite thing to do was gather friends and family and make bonfires and stand around the fire telling stories and laughing and singing.
Brian Doyle, in the article linked above.
My friend Kevin read the article recently, and was happy to oblige the request. He organized a firepit gathering at my neighbor Mark’s house on Tuesday night. We were a day late for Joe Strummer Day, but better late than never. It was a wonderful way to celebrate the spirit of a man who touched a lot of lives with his music and his stories.
I’ve read a lot of autobiographies from rock and rollers. Many of them include “the first time I met Joe Strummer” tales. And I’ve yet to read an unkind word about him. From all accounts, he was generous with his time, and liberal with his praise and encouragement.
Joe was only 50 when he passed away. The folks gathered around the fire on Tuesday have passed that milestone. I hope we’re able to keep Joe’s spirit burning brightly.
Think of it as a way to say hey to Joe Strummer, who was a good man, much missed; but think of it too as a way to honor what he cherished and savored in his own life: the way standing or sitting together matters, and telling stories matters, and laughing matters, and singing matters. That’s Joe Strummer’s true legacy, I think, more than the records he sold
Brian Doyle’s piece is quite short, and well worth the read. Mr. Doyle passed away in 2017. Like Joe, he left us with food for thought, with something to savor, with fond memories.
See you next December 22nd. Until then, keep the fire burning.
Raise a toast to Saint Joe Strummer I think he might have been our only decent teacher
Lyrics from “Constructive Summer” by The Hold Steady
OK, maybe winter just started, and the ‘rona is raging on across the globe (“now with a new faster-spreading mutation!”)
But in the Northern Hemisphere, the first day of winter is under our belt. (It’s a collective belt, and it’s very slimming!) That means we’ll get just a bit more daylight every day. It’s only a smidgen, a tad, a skosh… but psychologically, that means a lot to me. Starting and ending the workday in darkness is a real bummer — especially this year when my “office” since mid-March has been our dreary basement. But now the darkest night of the soul has passed. We can start to see the light…
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_cYVUjkzKeE
Sure, winter has only just begun, and soon I’ll be cursing the snow, the sleet, the freezing rain… heck, I’ll even shudder at the sight of an Icee.
(Bear and Brrrr.)
But at least I know Spring is getting closer.
(Her glass is half full… she drank the other half.)
And that’s enough to warm the cockles of my heart and get me through each dreary day.
Dubbatrubba would like to yield the floor to the gentleman from Michigan. Paul Mitchell is “disaffiliating” himself from the Republican party because of their alleged “leaders” refusal to grow a backbone and, as he calls it, #stopthestupid.
He kept trying to talk some sense into them…
… and to the Cheeto-in-Chief:
Finally, about a week ago, he threw in the towel and walked away from the Republican party, because more clowns kept joining the circus.
Mitchell noted that Republican leaders had been “collectively sit(ting) back and tolerat(ing) unfounded conspiracy theories and ‘stop the steal’ rallies without speaking out for our electoral process,” and the last straw for him seemed to be “the leadership of the Republican Party and our Republican Conference in the House actively participating in at least some of those efforts.”
He got fed up with too many Republicans caring more about power than they do about principles. Here’s a 60-second excerpt from his televised interview with CNN’s Jake Tapper.
The full article and interview can be found on CNN here.
It’s not just a Republican problem. This quote from Rep. Mitchell really rang true:
“In my opinion, the extremes of both parties are dragging their parties and this country off a cliff. The majority of Americans are in the middle. The majority of Americans want solutions to problems — want us to address them and not see who can have a political win. Not see who can grab political power for all it’s worth and actually do something to solve a problem for the American people. And frankly we haven’t done enough of that — haven’t done enough the last two terms. And this election simply confirms for me that it’s all about power first and that, frankly, is disgusting and demoralizing.”
Representative Paul Mitchell (I, formerly R), Michigan
He’s right. “We The People” want solutions to problems. That sometimes involves compromise, not stonewalling. Good-faith collaboration, not grandstanding. True respect for those with opposing views, not blind allegiance to the party line. Putting the people first, not power.
Paul Mitchell has already announced he won’t run for another term. I hope his parting words to his former party don’t fall on deaf ears, and his appeal to his colleagues in both parties will help them usher in an era of more civility and cooperation. But I’m not holding my breath…
I’d never heard of the website Defector until a few days ago, and didn’t realize that a gentleman named Drew Magary has been creating a hilarious annual “Hater’s Guide to the Williams-Sonoma Catalog” for several years now.
So thanks to my friend Daniele for putting the 2020 Hater’s Guide on my radar.
From the Defector website – Illustration by Jim Cooke
It is, hands down, the funniest piece I’ve read all year. Bitingly sarcastic, and laugh-out-loud (yes, an actual LOL!) funny.
The language is a bit salty, but Williams-Sonoma has earned every curse word with their exorbitantly priced wares.
Look again at that price. Now lemme add a few more gratuitous exclamation points. A H!!!U!!NDRED G!ODD!!!AMN D!!!!OLL!!!ARS!!!!!!! For a box of Hungry Jack, a squeeze bottle, a spatula, an obligatory tartan tchotchke, and some goddamn syrup. Now I’m a pancake enthusiast, so I know that the market for pure maple syrup is highly volatile. But for $100, I could drive to Vermont and tap a maple tree MYSELF to get the goods.
Drew Magary’s comments on the WILLIAMS-SONOMA CHRISTMAS BREAKFAST GIFT CRATE
Read it and weep – because you’ll be laughing so hard you’ll be crying.
BTW, my exhaustive research (i.e. typing “Defector website” into DuckDuckGo’s search box) has revealed that Defector is a bunch of… defectors from Deadspin.
David L. Lander passed away a couple of weeks ago. Name doesn’t ring a bell? How about if I call him “the guy who played ‘Squiggy’ on Laverne & Shirley“? If you’re in my age bracket, that should be all the info you need, because “Lenny” (David’s longtime friend Michael McKean) and “Squiggy” were indelible sitcom characters. They could steal a scene just by entering it:
McKean and Lander met as freshmen in college at Carnegie Tech in Pittsburgh, which is where they created their Lenny and Squiggy characters. Both later became performers in The Credibility Gap, a group that performed satirical comedy sketches on L.A. radio stations. Here’s a video version of one of The Credibility Gap’s most famous bits, featuring David L. Lander and Harry Shearer:
Long after his “Squiggy” heyday, Lander stayed busy with bit parts and voice acting gigs. Which is even more impressive when you consider the fact that he was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis in 1984, just a year after Laverne & Shirley concluded its run. He didn’t announce it publicly until 1999. (His 2002 book was entitled Fall Down Laughing: How Squiggy Caught Multiple Sclerosis and Didn’t Tell Nobody.) He later became an ambassador for M.S.
Oh, and he also worked as a baseball scout for the Anaheim Angels and the Seattle Mariners.
Also worth noting that in Hollywood, where marriages have the life cycle of a fruit fly, David and his wife got married in 1979.
Most of us will remember him as Squiggy — and that character was certainly quite memorable — but there was a lot more to David L. Lander.
For the second year in a row, Cincinnati claimed the top spot in SmartAsset’s assessment of the best cities for beer drinkers. Mainly because we have dozens of breweries, a plethora of bars, hundreds of beer varieties, and a decent cost of living.
We compared 384 cities across the following metrics: total number of breweries, breweries per 100,000 residents, average number of beers per brewery, bars per 100,000 residents and the average price of a pint.
The Germans who immigrated to Cincinnati in the 1800s really loved their bier. You couldn’t swing a dead knockwurst without hitting a brewery. Most of these businesses didn’t survive Prohibition. But a new generation of brewmeisters has done a great job reviving the old traditions… and putting a new spin on them, too.
Clip from the Art & Craft video from Leapframe and Neltner Small Batch. Full video is below.
Original artwork by my good friend Keith Neltner, done for an Artworks mural in the Over-the-Rhine area of Cincinnati. Learn more about the mural on Keith’s Neltner Small Batch website.
My wife and I went to our “local” brewery, Big Ash Brewing, last night.
Kevin Sullivan on Life advice from a man who lived it: “A good one Damian. Bring our lens into focus after the long weekend or our long life journey.” Jul 7, 09:38
Thomas Kuhl on We’re alive, because nothing happened.: “That is why we should celebrate every day when our feet hit the floor. Another to enjoy and share with…” Jun 25, 04:33
Thomas Kuhl on We’re alive, because nothing happened.: “This simply explains why we should celebrate every day our feet hit the floor. Another day to enjoy and share…” Jun 25, 04:31
You done said…